The Latest Dream

A while back I posted about a dream in which we were referred a 20 month-old boy and 9 week-old girl from Africa, somewhere, but not from Ghana. Last night, I dreamed we received a referral for lovely identical twin boys from Ghana, 18 months old. Things went well in the dream, which is nice, because most of my dreams are pretty strange and quite unsettling. Funny how when we were in the thick of adoption planning, paperwork, waiting for things to be sent here and there, I wasn't having any adoption dreams that I recall. Then this spring, which has pretty much involved waiting, being pre-occupied with job and household business, and wondering about the future of the Ghana program, I've had two...we'll see how long it takes for another one to come along.

Oh, and now I remember the weird part of the dream - we had to travel to Ghana for some adoption-related reason (not sure what) and were matched with our twins while there, totally unexpectedly, and were able to travel home with them right away. As a result, I had no opportunity to give notice of my parental leave, which I felt badly about. My employer, as I recall, was understanding, but I then learned leave was only expected to last 5.5 months, and I would be returning to work just before Christmas (great timing). I believe I woke up before re-approaching my employer to break the news that I planned to take the whole 9 months of leave permitted in Ontario! Ok, so the dream was odd, but overall still good :)

Remembering Bruckner

1999-June 8, 2009

Taking a moment to celebrate my sister's dog, Bruckner (seen here hanging out with my Scat, in a backyard garden at my place), a happy guy who shared 8 years as part of the family. He was adopted by my sister in Ohio, then moved in with us for 3 years along with my sister, where he developed a lovely friendship with our greyhound, Gatsby, put up with our cats (sometimes salivating after them, especially Scat), and endured Phineas, our basset. Most recently he enjoyed meeting Gladwyn (who must have looked enough like a greyhound for his taste) and sharing his home with our new niece. He hung in there for a little while with lymphoma, enough time for some more good walks, visits, and memories.

Looking Good

Thanks to everyone who has participated in prayer for the Ghana program! We received word this morning that the program remains open, and that while it is still developing, the plan is to move forward. Because some of the details will take time to solidify, there may not be much news for a while, and we know that a referral is still a little ways off, but that's just fine!

Prayer...

Interestingly, I've been working my way through Philip Yancey's book, Prayer: Does it Make Any Difference? lately, after our small group finished a video study on the same. Well, this week is a great chance to look at the practical applications of that reading. The future of the Ghana program in Canada is extremely precarious and will be decided shortly. The question is, do we beg for what we want (partly for us, partly for all the other families involved, partly for the children who are and will be born needing a family), do we ask for peaceful acceptance of any outcome, do we focus on finding clarity in terms of our own future direction in all of this? Or some combination? If we believe that adoption is a good thing and that enabling Canadians to adopt Ghanain children meets crucial human needs, then it makes sense to pray for removal of barriers to this good and restorative work. Yancey's book explores the age-old question of whether it is possible to influence God. I am inclined to agree with the suggestion that at times God does choose to act based on our sincere requests. Particularly if those requests are in line with that which is good and right. So until we know otherwise, feel free to pray specifically that Ghana will remain open to Canadian adoptive parents.

If it does not, then we will need clarity in knowing what to do next. And we will focus on that if the time comes. I would like to say this is all completely unexpected, but I'm so inclined toward a slightly pessimistic view that I can't say I'm altogether shocked. Although I'm quite open to being pleasantly surprised & proven wrong!

Hoping...

We continue to wait for news about progress with the Ghana program after the hopefully short delay while a few matters are clarified and sorted out between countries. Things have been looking hopeful, although there is apparently some uncertainty now around length of stay in-country, which we very much trust will not result in major changes to the process, based on what we understood when we signed on. So, we continue to wait, and check daily for any news confirming where things are at.

Convocation!!! & Flight Practice

Hmm, so we were in Halifax for the weekend to attend my Master's convocation (at last!), and since we flew there and back, I figured this would be good practice for eventual travel to Ghana. I don't really like flying for a number of reasons, but was quite pleased with the very relaxed and smooth flights to Halifax. If that had been the end of it, I would have been delighted with my progress! Unfortunately, we had to fly back.

For our first leg of the return flight, I was feeling good as we entered the plane, until we realized that for some reason we were not seated together. Not only that, but we had been assigned middle seats. I had been specific in requesting aisle seats when I booked online, so I'm not sure if there were no aisle seats available, or if I made a mistake, and I am really not sure how I missed that detail when accepting the seats. The flight attendant tried to get us other seats, but to no avail. So I sat there, between two strangers, quietly suffocating and wondering how & when I would manage to get to the bathroom if/when necessary. Then the guy in the aisle seat ahead reclined his chair, and the aisle lady beside me put down her tray. TRAPPED!

And then the turbulence started. Actually, I think it had already started. The real "event" happened after the drinks had been served. When the plane dropped suddenly, drinks spilling and arms lifting off the armrests, that pretty much did me in for the rest of the flight. Even the landing felt noisy and rocky, and until we actually stopped moving, I just needed to get OUT.

I found out afterward that poor Geoff was sitting in his middle seat without even the distraction of a working TV screen (which explained why I noticed he didn't buy any headphones, since we couldn't share this time) or book (as he had stowed his carry-on overhead, thinking we'd be switching seats).

Thankfully, the very short final flight on a little plane was smooth, although at that point any bumps and noises were a bit unnerving, so it felt good to arrive at our home airport safe & sound! Not sure I'm itching to fly again anytime soon...


And other than the flying, we did have a really nice time - good weather, and opportunity to hit a few destinations - the lovely Halifax harbour, Wolfville & the Minas Basin (Bay of Fundy/Annapolis Valley area), Eastern Shore (lovely beaches), and Southern Shore (quaint towns & beautiful coastline). It's great to find an excuse to travel east every so often!

Adoption Perspective - Article Link

Yes, I shamelessly steal links from other people's posts on blogs and online adoption groups. Just wanted to be transparent about that. One of these days I'll try to find something myself, and then others are quite welcome to "borrow" my link!

Anyway, this short article is about Hugh Jackman's perspective on adoption, where he comments on his own international adoptions, and makes reference to the publicity surrounding Madonna's adoptions.

http://celebrity-babies.com/2009/05/06/hugh-jackman-defends-madonnas-malawian-adoption/

Way Off Topic...Jazz & Figure Skating

Ok, so this is MAINLY a blog to chronicle our adoption, but since there's no news at the moment, I may as well fill the space with some unrelated "other news" and photos! A consistent side topic since I started this blog has been our pets, the dogs mostly (sorry cats - guess you'll have to spice things up to get yourselves in print more often), but today I am heading into completely new territory to fill you in on the shows we've been to in the past week! And hey, these are things our children will be exposed to when they join our family, so there's some relevance, right?

First, a lovely evening with Diana Krall (wishing I had taken my older, but far "zoomier" Canon S1IS which takes great action shots - sorry Fuji F40fd - you're great for other things, like coming everywhere with me - and in fairness, we were sitting in the closest thing to nosebleeds at the JLC):


And today, an enjoyable afternoon at "Stars on Ice" - featuring Kurt Browning, Sale & Pelletier, Jennifer Robinson, Jeffrey Buttle, Sasha Cohen, Dubreuil & Lauzon, Joannie Rochette, Cynthia Phaneuf, Shawn Sawyer, and Dube & Davidson (taken on the good old Canon S1IS - proving that my new Canon xsi SLR can't quite replace an easily transported point & shoot all the time):

Trillium Season...Again!

Wow, second year in a row that I actually made it out into the "wild" during Trillium season - carpets of them everywhere at our Lake Huron campground!

Camping Kick-off...Not Quite as Planned

To borrow the trendy 1950s slang term popular in the movie "Mr. Hobbs Takes a Vacation" which we saw last night in the comfort of our trailer on our first camping night of the season...this weekend has been so "weird"...

The campground opened May 1, and we were there by 4:00pm, having left home in good time and having stopped for groceries just before the campground. Well, within about half an hour after arriving, I rounded the corner of the van with a load of groceries, on my way into the trailer, and spotted Gladwyn, roaming free, without her harness, no longer hitched to the sturdy tie-out she had been on since arriving. Sickening, sudden horror. Gladwyn has only been with us for three weeks, and while her timidity is often not apparent with us at home anymore, she is still very skittish and shy, and does not reliably come when called. And here we were, surrounded by forest, farmland, Lake Huron, and highway, in territory completely unfamiliar to Gladwyn. Few people around (and little good that would do with a dog who is afraid of people) as well. Just about the scariest thing I've experienced. She started off in the campground area, almost approached some folks and their dogs, almost came to take a treat from me, but then took the trail up the steep forest slope into the woods. We had left Hesper tethered in her spot at the trailer, unsupervised, while we scrambled up, Geoff in the lead. Both of us truly unsure we would ever see this lovely, frightened dog again, knowing she would not come to us freely. What an utter sense of helplessness and desperation, pleading out loud for divine intervention, and leaving my carefully protected Birkenstocks at the mercy of the deep mud and puddles along the wet trail. After circling after her for what seemed like ages, and almost catching her twice, I finally approached her and latched onto her collar when she left the trails and stopped, huddled in fear amongst some bare evergreen branches. Without a leash, I held onto her collar for dear life while Geoff ran back for a leash, and for Hesper, and eventually Gladwyn calmed enough to enjoy the doggie "junk food" I had grabbed as we headed after her. It still makes me sick to think what our weekend could have been like...but, I have also been oh, so thankful for a few important factors:
- That I saw her leaving, as it would have been so easy for her to slip away unnoticed and simply vanish (it turns out she managed to wiggle free of her harness, which was found still securely attached to the tie-out).
- That she never broke into a full run - despite being frightened and trying to avoid capture, she maintained a trot, occasionally stopping to sniff or to listen to Geoff's pleas for her to sit - we were able to keep her within eyesight through the woods at all times.
- That she left the trail (initially NOT something I wanted her to do) and entered thicker brush, which finally stopped her.
- That she didn't fight once we finally had her, as holding a dog by the collar can be tricky, and she could have initially slipped her collar had she tried hard enough (thankfully we were able to tighten it while I kept a firm grip).
- That we realized the potential for escape now, rather than having a tragic and unexpected incident another time.

And now, we are going to sign her up for obedience classes as soon as possible, while starting some more intensive work at home on behaviours like responding to her name, coming when called, and sitting on command, particularly when stressed. We are also going to research no-escape harnesses, and the gated deck-building is definitely the first priority at the trailer. Wow.

Moving on from that incident, we managed to settle in for a nice evening yesterday, a sound sleep last night, and a lovely day today. Had the dogs out for a couple of trail walks, got some reading in, and enjoyed part of a great campfire (complete with roasted weiners)...but before we reached s'mores time, Geoff's pager went off. So he drove up the hill where he can get cell phone reception, only to pull up a bit later, off & running to get us all packed up so he could get home and head into work on an emergency building call. So here I am, at home, typing, instead of watching a movie in cozy trailer comfort. But I am sitting here with TWO dogs curled up beside me, so I really can't complain!

Blog Comments - Keep Them Coming!

It's great when folks choose to comment on a blog post - I enjoy knowing people are reading, and it's also a lovely way of getting feedback and hearing about shared experiences. Thanks!

Hopefully Just a Blip...

Heading into the weekend, it seems a bit of turbulence in the Ghana orphanage world is going to create at least a small delay in adoption process in Canada and perhaps more broadly...for now, we will hope it is simply a small delay while some issues are resolved and investigated (which is important, so there is no blame to be laid). One never knows, though, what this may mean, so pray for these issues, including clarity and clear communication between involved parties, and an openness to resolution and efficient restoration of the system. Also pray for families waiting for referrals, and in particular those who have referrals already as these unknowns and delays can be so hard to bear.

The Waiting & Matching Process

Here's a link from our agency's website explaining some of the factors involved in matching a child and family, as well as some of the steps that happen before a referral can be given to a waiting family:

http://www.imagineadoption.ca/process_childplacementandmatching.html

We field regular questions about the length of the process, and when we "expect" news - there really isn't a timeframe, and this link helps explain why that is. We try not to expect anything, and will just be surprised & excited when our turn comes! If you have an urge to ask us a question about our adoption, feel free to inquire about things like the nursery, baby products, minivans, etc. - we can happily give you answers & opinions on those things, just not about adoption timeframes & updates.

Gladwyn

Happy will now be known as Gladwyn, a lovely name and a noun with both English (the name) and Latin (the noun, gladius) roots:

Gladwyn - name meaning "happy friend" (in honour of her original name, Happy)

Gladwyn - "sword grass" - used generally in regard to plants referred to as "sword lily" (including Gladiolus) and specifically to the Gladwyn Iris (iris foetidissima) - most Gladioli species are native to southern and tropical Africa, and the Gladwyn Iris grows in Europe & North Africa (so I managed to get my Africa connection in, too...)

And, both Gladiolus & the Gladwyn Iris are members of the iridaceae family, as is the Hesperantha Coccinea (evening flower) - see my May 6, 2008 Hesper post for more info on that naming adventure!

Thanks to the following sites (and more, and Google) for these research findings:
paghat.com
dictionary.net
wikipedia.com
babynamesonline.co.uk

And now, I think I am all "name-researched-out" for this week.

Remembering Gatsby

Today (April 11) marks the first anniversary of my lovely boy's death after two short weeks of illness last spring. I love this photo that captures his quiet nature - this won a 2nd place ribbon in a local fall fair a couple of years ago - thanks Gatsby! Our new foxhound girl really reminds me of Gatsby in some ways, with her lanky, muscular build and white fur with ticking...not to mention the soulful eyes. I could never replace my sweet boy, but it is a kind reminder to see pieces of him in other dogs.