This is What Happens...

You know those times you decide to do something festive AND support family in the process? Like attending your niece's high school Christmas concert? With three youngsters in tow? When the afternoon has been a steady downward descent into a parenting disaster zone?

Of course, you attend, because you said you would. And because it is the festive season. And you want to support your niece.

Then your 3 year-old has a tantrum during the third song, and you carry her out as quickly as possible while trying to avoid falling headfirst down the super-steep auditorium steps that are of varying depths and have no railing.

So you are killing time in a high school hallway with a child who has just been screaming, "Let me go!" and "I want to ride the alligator [elevator]!!!", wondering if you dare show your face in the auditorium again (and how long it will be before you are back out, in the hallway).

And as you wait a bit longer, observing your child's degree of emotional regulation to determine her readiness to try the concert again, you decide to  peruse the wares on display for the silent auction. You have never before bid on silent auction items, but the knitted wool ladies socks, shawl, and baby sweater catch your eye. The starting bid is low, so you figure you may has well have a go at it. Then, in your reluctance to re-enter the auditorium with a potentially volatile little human, you browse some more and end up bidding (half in amusement) on these:
  


http://www.qcsupply.com/farm-girl-boyfriend-cap.html









http://farmboybrand.myshopify.com/collections/caps-farm-girl/products/all-farm-girl-straw-hat

After enduring an intermission that included children (literally) trying to climb the grooved auditorum walls, jumping down sets of steps (from the highest point - seriously, the steepest steps ever), running and shrieking, and performing other antics involving kicking siblings' seats, chewing gum picked up off of the floor, flipping seats, climbing steps and seats (and falling off), kicking the backs of others' seats, whining and crying (again), and more...at least you end up with the satisfaction of coming home with these hats.

And darn it all, these hats will be worn come summer, despite one's husband intending to have a good laugh every time one of them is sported.

Laughter is good medicine, so I'm doing him a favour.

Transitions

Autumn has advanced steadily through November, with the landscape telling of winter to come.

After moving from our home of 13 years in early October, we have spent the past weeks adjusting, setting up house, and trying to beat the cold and snow with some necessary outdoor projects - the first of which were gates and finishing touches on existing fencing, to secure the hounds. We added a safety cover to the pool - an added measure of peace of mind (especially after one hound fell in while I was standing beside her keeping watch). A separate pool fence is in progress, but heavy snow yesterday will put that project on hold for the moment. Snow here doesn't tend to stay for the winter until after Christmas, so I expect there will be a thaw and some slightly warmer temperatures again in order to finish that project (which needs to be done, even with the safety cover, since the same hound tried walking across it this morning, now that it looks different with snow on it...and I imagine a child or two would do the same once it is completely snow-covered).

As a result of moving, we closed our trailer late. Here is a scene from the edge of our campsite:

At home we have been able to fully observe the changing season. When we arrived in October, everything was still lush and green. The few containers we brought with us gave us another month of flowers before frost did its work, and there were roses still covering our new rose bushes.

Here are a few views from our new property -

Looking north-west:

 

 Looking north-east:

 

 Looking east:

 

 Looking south-east:

 

 Looking south - the view from our rear windows, onto the back yard and beyond: 

(The forest is not ours, but we certainly enjoy the scenery it offers)!

 

 The first snowfall:

 

We are so pleased with the new house - the layout and space are working wonderfully for our family, and our new town (a couple of kilometres away) is proving to be quite delightful so far. We already have a pile of amusing stories about people getting to know us. It is the kind of place where one can't really be anonymous for too long!

In the midst of unpacking and setting things up, I have managed to get started on Christmas decorating, to add a little seasonal warmth to the surroundings. We are quite a bit further from the city here, but the country drives are lovely. Here is what we found en route to our homeschool field trip last week:

Nature is so restorative, and although I typically enjoy it by driving through it rather than diving in on foot, I am thankful for the sights and the reminder that transitions can be beautiful, and savoured as we bid farewell to one chapter, and greet a new one.

Out of Nowhere...

 ...here I am!

After a typically long absence, I decided to make a blog appearance, and as is becoming my habit, it will mainly be in photos. Starting with cows against woodlot, because I love seeing cows in treed areas. We stopped by the roadside so I could snap quite a few pics from the truck window.

The next is a rare glimpse of the back of the back yard, featuring the compost area. I don't take many photos of the compost area. Baby girl is hauling some weeds...worth capturing on camera, because I haven't been around much weed-hauling this season. Kinda let the gardens go...we're moving, after all. Ok, so I've kind of let it go since 2007, after a car accident that left us a little achey all summer. We're fine now, but the gardens are still suffering. Geoff and the kids did a big weed-fest recently, in time for hosting my mom's 60th birthday gathering.
   

We have managed quite a few single nights at the trailer this season. Really wish we had been able to do a few more two-nighters, but we've had something going on most Sundays, and have been heading home Saturday evening. With beautiful weather it was hard to stay home this weekend (I even packed for the kids), but I had to agree with Geoff that our garage (aka, storage warehouse) is unlikely to magically sort, purge, and pack itself. When we have been at the trailer, there have been plenty of scenes like this:

 

I am having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that it was already one week ago that we left for our Labour Day getaway with friends, and that this time away, which was thirstily anticipated all summer, has passed. It was great...just not long enough. We have not taken any time off this year, due to the moving situation, so my main "vacation" will be unpacking and setting up the new house (which will be fun in some ways...and...yeah). I'm just going to stare at these pictures of The Falcon (our '69 trailer that has been enjoyed by us since 2007 - definitely got our money's worth) in just about the most idyllic camp site ever (on our friend's parents' property), until I believe I am actually there...

            

The kids did fantastically on the two-hour 'serious business' trail we do every year at Georgian Bay...Baby boy (he's 5 now! Wow!) hitched a ride right at the very end. Big brother managed on foot the whole time. Baby girl actually did the whole thing, too, until the last few minutes, impressing some rock climbers who were awed by her scrambling skills.

 

The kids had an extended play-time at the town beach, while Geoff joined some locals on his trumpet at the park. On Day 1, the swim was unplanned, and it was windy and chilly...hence the new tie-dyed t-shirts I nabbed from a Farmer's Market vendor right at closing to keep them a bit warmer on the walk home. 

And since it's 9:30pm and I haven't had supper, that's the end for today. 

Life These Days...in Pictures

Happy Canada Day folks!

I finally caught up on some photo uploading over the weekend. Phew.

Since I'm terrible at journaling (and blogging), it's a good thing I typically take tons of pictures. I was amazed, however, going through the photos this time and realizing how much the kids are growing up and changing. I keep expecting them to look like they did 2 years ago when they came home. Sigh. (Doesn't help that it's been such a long time since I uploaded and organized photos - it really was a bit of a shock).

Anyway, here are a few glimpses into life around our place these days...

First, food. We tried out some home-made whole wheat rolls. And, yes. Recommended.

 
 I keep finding this scene in the living room - variations on a theme:

 

Poor hounds have a really rough life.

We held our first ever birthday party for the boys. Grandma and Grandpa brought along some sacks, which was fun for the kids and entertaining for the adults :)

 

We've walked a bit - my baby boy doesn't play Daddy often, but I try to snap a photo when he does - love seeing little boys with dolls. Big boy always prefers his "grown up" activities, and snapping pictures is fine with me. 

 

 A moth humoured us by sitting for an extended nature study at the campground. He finally flew away when my camera lens had been in his face one too many times.

 Don't you love it when your kids play "sleeping"? I do.

 
Speaking of kids,  I am posting from the campground, and imagine my few minutes of uninterrupted solitude may be over soon - I hear the two youngest getting a long nicely outside with their imaginary play, while Geoff and Lute work on a puzzle. It's been a slightly cool weekend, so no swimming, but overall I'd rather have it this way rather than super-hot.

That's it for today, folks. Enjoy your week!

A Snapshot of Sibling Dynamics in the Heat of the Moment...

Picture a raging - screaming, aggressive - nearly-5 year-old swaddled on the floor with his parent, to contain him, protect others, and (hopefully) provide a sense of safety and eventual calm. Then see his 3 year-old sibling entering, wanting closeness with her mama, perhaps re-assurance. She grabs her own blanket and tries to wrap herself and snuggle up beside the pair on the floor. Restraining, cuddling, all together.

As she settles in, she leans toward her dysregulated brother and tells him she loves him. Next, 5 year-old big brother enters. He has been occupying himself, and no one had attended to the recorded music coming from an electronic toy in the playroom, until he informs us that he thought the music might be nice for his brother. When acknowledged for his thoughtfulness, he brings the musical globe into the room and begins to take requests.

Within minutes, my boy has begun to return from the depths of his fury. I force myself out of self-imposed silence - a survival strategy used to ride things out without feeding anyone's anger further - and snuggle my "twins", going yet further - which takes a great deal of emotional effort - to begin a hunt for belly buttons and play a few tickling games. Once everyone has shrieked with laughter, and I have distracted them by pointing out a passing farm vehicle, we attempt to resume "normal" and hope it lasts for at least a little while... 

 

More winter chit-chat...

Well, baby girl is 3. Same age her big brother was when they all came home. Wowzers. To celebrate, she requested cherry cake and a straw for her drink. Both requests were accommodated. She also mentioned a few times that she wanted a pink Wii remote. And don't tell my old self, but that's what she got. My 3-year-old. A Wii remote. Enough said about that.

 I was very privileged to be able to attend TWO figure skating events at the world championships, thanks to tickets passed on to friends, who in turn shared the wealth with many others - a real treat! I don't follow the sport closely, but like to catch a bit on TV here and there, and enjoy the occasional live event...

On my day off with the kids last week, we managed to get out for a walk around town (if I made that sound like quite the feat...well, that's because it surely can be just that - most of our Fridays end up cycling through all the old dysregulation with a particular child, often resulting in cancelled plans and limited "quality time" with any of them...so it's always nice when plans work out). Anyway, right across the road, we spent some time throwing ice/snow chunks as far into the ravine as possible, aiming for the water. It was a highlight of the month for the boys, I think!

On Family Day I gave in and agreed to a hike. I'm fine once I get out there...I just hate gearing up, mentally and literally. We have gorgeous hiking trails within a 3-4 minute drive from our house, so we have no good excuse for neglecting the opportunity...I only wish I had brought the Ergo carrier along (initially forgot, then didn't go back, thinking I had taken it out of the vehicle, only to find it in the vehicle after the hike. Figures)...baby girl was not in the mood for walking (despite having done this route nearly 18 months ago, all on foot), so we alternated carrying her on our backs for the 2-hour outing...

My winter decor is all packed up now. Indoors, anyway (we still have greenery up outside). Some spring items have made an appearance - one good thing about having the house for sale is that it demands that we stay on top of seasonal decor changes and other basic organizational needs...other than that, I can't think of many other good things about being in limbo with the house...

Looking ahead, we have a couple more birthdays coming up this month, and will be hosting my parents for a few days. I need to start planning the summer (this is early for me to look that far into the future), because there are a couple of specific events/opportunities that are of great interest. One would involve living on my new bike for a few days, which is an exciting and somewhat alarming prospect. Another would involve some in-person training and a great family vacation all wrapped up in one. So we'll see how much of that (if any) turns out to be realistic!

Scenes of the Season

Winter is having a bit of an identity crisis around here this year, but we have snow and chill again this weekend...and this morning I slipped into the back yard in an effort to snap a few photos of a pair of cardinals. Unfortunately, it seems that photographing birds while being trailed by a two year-old and an enthusiastic pair of hounds is an exercise in futility. It was, however, an amazing morning for birds. After the cardinals flew off, I enjoyed watching some other little birds flitting about the yard, observed a raven hanging around nearby, spied a number of pigeons plump and round on their branches, and watched a woodpecker at work.

The woodpecker obliged for a moment before the human and canine activity prompted him to move on (but not long enough for me to sort out all the details with my rarely-used zoom lens, camera settings, and stability). Ah well.

Although we continue to keep our eyes open for a suitable acreage, my little back yard adventure this morning made me very thankful for our tree-filled small-town subdivision and yard.

A couple of weeks ago, my lovely Motet hung around for a little photo shoot on the kitchen counter (she usually comes right at me for some quality time as soon as I pull out a camera, and I can't often get a still picture of her). So hard to believe that this pretty girl is 16, turning 17 in March. We've been a pair since she was 6 weeks old.

Gladwyn also humoured me today, by staying still and actually looking in my direction for a few photos. Likely helped that she was in one of her favourite places (my bed) and therefore disinclined to move.

 

January has been busy, with a late family Christmas mid-month. And since I don't usually rush to take down Christmas decorations, they remained up through the end of the month. Now that we have entered February (and are actively showing the house), I figured we should likely pack things away, which meant snapping a few shots before dismantling it all.

I am enjoying driving up to my house more than ever this winter...with the new siding, door, and trim colours, and the shutters and new windows, it looks so crisp and quaint (the discoloured white siding really didn't do much for the place against a backdrop of bright white snow).

   
And so, a few scenes from Winter 2013.

As usual, I am already lamenting the slow start to my to-do list for the year, which will mostly remain undone come October and November, when I lament how little I completed in the previous 10 months. And, as I might have predicted, I am itching to sign up for another course of study (it has, after all, been nearly 4 years since I graduated with my Master's degree...this time 'round I am really drawn to the Neufeld Institute, which offers a course of study that looks like a fantastic fit with my professional background and current/future interests, and would be a huge boost to my personal and parenting skills as well). But we shall see. Life is certainly full enough with work, home, church, community, social, leisure, and family pursuits. As usual, I come up with about 10 great blog topics per day, all in my head, and by the time I get to a computer I invariably forget what I wanted to write about. I have some new thoughts about attachment progress in each of my kiddos (the youngest of which is about to turn THREE in just over a month). We have also made some (hopefully? likely?) temporary changes in our homeschooling adventure, having enroled the boys in JK and SK for the winter term. So far they are doing well, but I still envision the flexible, family-focused lifestyle and individualized learning homeschool would offer longer term.

For tonight, though, I will try to set aside a few of these constant questions about where we are headed, and perhaps enjoy a few chapters of the book I need to finish for book club next week, while outside, the snow brightens the night.

 

What Do You Want to Hear About?

It is quite clear by now that I am a ridiculously inconsistent blogger. I also write way too much when I do write. Really, it is likely more of a journal than anything, which is good, since life passes in such a blur that I lose most of it if I don't record it in words or pictures. Anyway, I often think about incredibly fascinating blog post topics throughout the day, either when I am doing something like driving, working/trying to work, caring for children, or being tired. Then I forget what I wanted to write about.

So, what do you want to hear/read?

Here are some facts of my life to help you come up with topics for me :)

• We have 3 kiddos, ages 2, 4, and 5, adopted together 18 months ago through public adoption. I could say an awful lot about that if I took the time. It has been easy and hard, surprising and just as I expected, fascinating and tedious, ugly and beautiful, energizing and exhausting.
• We have 4 pets - two hounds and two cats, who were living with us before kids.
• We are small-town folk, minutes from the (sort of) big city.
• Our house is old, and was likely rescued from either being flipped on the cheap, decaying gradually, or pretty much being de-boned and re-built. We did something in between. We like it. It has taken more than a decade to "basically" be finished renovations.
• Speaking of houses and small towns, we keep dreaming of an acreage, ideally still with an old house. A roomy one, with good space for potentially more kids, a private (but windowed and not TOO secluded) home office, at least a couple of living spaces to spread out with company & do homeschool, a barn, a workshop, a rolling landscape with nooks and crannies, and ideally even a little storefront space in case we get around to being a bit more consistent with our crafting.
• Our boys are being homeschooled - first official year. Considering some major work changes this fall, it's going reasonably well, I think.
• Our goal is to have a parent around full-time. For four weeks now, we are living what is hopefully a very short-term experiment with my husband working full-time again after parental leave, and me working 4 days/week (mostly from home), with an in-home, part-time nanny/sitter/caregiver. If anything, the arrangement is proving that this is not the lifestyle for us long-term. I think it's going as well as could be, generally, but freedom and flexibility and being with the kids are definitely more important than the frills we can enjoy with an extra job.
• We like to craft, on an amateur-ish scale, and got caught up in the moment and ended up registering to be vendors at a local Christmas sale next weekend. So I am madly sewing up hand-puppets today, while Geoff whips up some more wood pieces, and we plan to show up with those items, along with some birdhouses, left-over Africa bags from our adoption fund raising, accessories (scarf sort-of things and fabric necklaces), and see how it goes.
• I love food of all kinds, including junk and fast food, but we eat pretty well at home (minus my add-on snacking habit). I keep working toward a goal of all-natural eating, cosmetics, cleaning products, etc. We have made progress, but still have plenty of room for improvement.
• Faith and church are a big deal to us. Geoff and I help teach youth Sunday School, join the band or choir with trumpet (Geoff) or flute (me) on occasion, and have just joined the choir. Our contemporary and traditional/liturgical services start a trial combined period tomorrow, with a slightly more contemporary focus (we attend the traditional, as a rule). I am part of an ad-hoc committee planning the new services. This is clearly a major "thing" for everyone in our church right now.
• I enjoy the flexibility and variety in my work as an occupational therapist with a small, private health clinic. Most of my clients have been injured in car accidents, and I see them in their homes, workplaces, and at the clinic. My first 11 years of practice were spent in inpatient adolescent psychiatry, so the past 3.5 years have been a huge learning curve and change of pace. I like to learn, and finished a distance master's degree in my field a few years ago. I suspect more formal learning could very well be in my future, but I don't have a specific direction or plan at the moment. Research, writing, editing, and planning all equal good times in my opinion :)
• Increasingly, I am uncomfortable with excess and self-indulgence, although I still feel excessive and self-indulgent despite being more attentive to my habits in certain areas. For so many reasons, selfish and unselfish, I think much peace and freedom lies in simplicity. As a person with many interests and a love of variety, this is a constant battleground.
• I am losing track of time, and must get the kids up if we are going to make it to the next town's Christmas activities, especially the horse-drawn wagon ride and visit with Santa. The whole Santa thing is another area of mixed feelings. I would be happy to write about that, too.

Irony and Uncertainty

Well, we lost the house on which we had an accepted (conditional) offer. Someone came in with a firm offer last week, and our place is still for sale, so we had to concede.

This morning I sent my "Wish(ful Thinking) List" to our realtors, and they will keep their eyes peeled for something suitable...but our list is long, and since we do love our current home (other than the layout issues and inability to have livestock), we are not prepared to settle for anything less exciting than the place we had hoped for.

Ironically, we officially lost the house on the very morning that Geoff headed back to work for the first time since February...in part to help finance our move to the countryside. Now, he will be working full-time again (at least for a while), we have a caregiver for the kids (so far, I think it will work out well - but oh boy, there is some testing of limits and behavioural expectations going on), and things are pretty much up in the air.

We knew the potential move involved some risk of ending up in this very scenario, but it still stings. We would have made some different work-related decisions had this not been our goal, and we took the plunge on some exterior renovations on our place in order to make it more appealing to potential buyers.

So, since Geoff is working again, and since we have spruced up our place, we are currently leaning toward leaving ourselves open to explore the market, and not making any hasty decisions about unlisting our house. Which means there is plenty of uncertainty combined with lots of adjustments for us all with getting used to the work and child care situations.

Time will tell...

Change of Seasons

Oh, autumn this year is bringing change along with it.

My leaves are golden and orange, and from the window on my left, the morning sun streams through them, illuminating them. 

To my right, rusty orange chrysanthemums add a seasonal touch to my work space. 

And on the front lawn, the blue real estate sign that I can now look at without knots forming in my gut. It went up Thursday evening, last week. And somehow, although we had been contemplating a move for over 6 weeks, that sign nearly did me in. 

It is all self-inflicted. The home we bought 12 years ago, in my mind hopefully forever...the home we brought back from the brink of its downward spiral into non-existence (it was a worn-out, poorly maintained bank foreclosure that last saw better days 20 or so years before us, when the story goes that it was meticulously decorated and maintained - likely those owners we can thank for some of the core electrical updates, etc., that made it at least worth our consideration)...this home may not be ours much longer.

 

I love our small town, its easy access to the city (I am never sure whether people believe me, but we can get anywhere in the nearest city within less than 30 minutes, which is better than living in one corner of the city and having to weave one's way through it), its quiet streets and proximity to hiking (um, yeah, we rarely avail ourselves of that...but still), the countryside I get to enjoy going to and from the city.

However, the lure of a few acres has never left me. And some issues with layout have presented themselves now that we have three kids sharing our space. My office, the playroom, and the living room are all in the same spot, and I work from home when I'm not seeing clients. Some days are long and distracting as I bounce up and down to assist and interject with various parenting duties. If we stay, the office must move upstairs, to the spare bedroom, which leaves no room for further family expansion (one never knows, right - our social worker has made it quite clear she is ready to work with us as soon as we say the word), and very little room for overnight guests.

A smaller family could easily use a bigger bedroom for a family room and work things out quite nicely, but for entertaining, well, I pretty much wouldn't bother having another family with kids over to enjoy a visit other than during outdoor season (we do have a huge yard, which I love). Our eating space is just about maxed out, and again, if we stay, we need to look at moving the table into the dining/lounge/foye space on the other side of our kitchen peninsula (we currently to that for sit-down meals with company), but then it really clogs up our main floor space what with dogs and children underfoot continually).

Every surface in our house has our touch. Every floor finish, every wall, all the bathrooms and kitchens. All the woodwork - all of it has been either refinished or replaced. To sell, we have now had the siding painted, added shutters, changed the whole exterior colour scheme, and installed a number of new windows (I caved at last...but must admit the new ones are exactly the same scale as the old, and I do enjoy having screens to be able to open them).

But we found this place. This yellow brick Victorian farmhouse on 5 acres - rolling acres with a bit of pasture, trees, a creek (and bridge), a pond. A barn. On a road far less busy than ours, but with some traffic to draw in customers for birdhouses and other bits and pieces we enjoy selling. Great zoning for all kinds of business and agricultural functions. Municipal water and gas. A cute town less than 5 minutes away, with basic amenities (including Tim Horton's and an ambulance dispatch - the essentials). A house with additions to meet our unique needs like a home office, crafting (and possible storefront) area, entertaining (with rooms for kids to go off and play nearby or further away, while the adults chat), homeschooling, and extended overnight guest stays. A house with room for more kids, just in case. An open staircase (with a great photo gallery wall). High ceilings. No closets. Oops, that's not a plus, is it? A house with all the essential modernities (electrical, etc.), but with few projects to keep us busy. Seems we are project people, like it or not - we gravitate toward a creative challenge. 

So here we are. Waiting to see what will happen. A conditional offer has been accepted, and our house must sell, so I keep speaking in hypothetical terms. At the very least, our current place looks a fair sight better now, and getting some momentum going on organizational and decluttering projects is not a bad thing, no matter what comes of this.

(And now, a brief interlude to enjoy some Canadian wildlife):

Added to all this, Geoff has decided to return to work later this month. He continues to take some courses, and needs a means of funding those. And of course, there is always the thought of qualifying for another parental leave if need be (seems worth some time at work, to earn that opportunity again). With my flexible schedule, we can minimize child care by having someone come to us, and have someone who is very much looking forward to the opportunity.

I never saw myself having child care...but this arrangement will be 3-4 days/week, with me being available most mornings, and our sitter/nanny likely being mainly responsible for the kids on those days for 3.5-4 hours, until their rest time, after which Geoff will be home while I finish my work day. I actually find myself looking forward a bit to seeing how it goes, and think it will likely be good for me and the kids for me to be more actively involved in some of their morning routines again, and to be their caregiver on Fridays (I definitely have relied a lot on Geoff for those things while he has been off, and am sometimes a bit disconnected, I think).

So, our season of change, and change of seasons has come. The kids are doing well at the moment. The boys have been responding well to the homeschooling routine. We have attended a couple of field trips with a local homeschool network. Baby girl decided to start using the toilet more often than not last week. Something just clicked one day, and she's been doing wonderfully since then (I never really pushed a formal training routine - just offered her opportunities to sit on the toilet here and there - and nothing happened, until last week).

It is Thanksgiving Day, and I should go join the family for Eggs Benedict now. Have a Happy Thanksgiving :)

I Almost Posted

Some blogger I am, eh?

I was well into a post about returning to work, kids, and houses, when I deleted the whole thing. Apparently I have no trouble at all blabbing away on Facebook about everything in my life and on my mind, but I get stumped about what to write here.

It is not for lack of verbosity, as my preferred approach is to write freely without much editing for conciseness (although I do enjoy the challenge of a status update sound bite). I don't really feel too concerned about putting select pieces of my life on here for public consumption. So I'm not sure what it is, exactly.

So tonight, you get to spend a precious few minutes reading a post about not posting. Sorry. And now I really must go and see if I can scramble to prepare at least one fair entry so I don't spend the next 12 months lamenting that I didn't have any submissions. The kids made mud pies, and Geoff has birdhouses, so surely I can whip up something in the last two or so hours of my day...

It's Still Summer

While I am seeing some leaves turning (and dropping) after a dry, dry summer so far, and I am not minding little reminders that fall is around the corner, I am still in summer mode - which is likely easier to hold on to, since the boys will be learning at home this year (JK and SK) and our routine basically stays the same, with the addition of more structured learning time in the mornings (something we tried out in the Spring, with great results).

I don't think it would be possible to over-state how delighted I am NOT to be part of the early morning and afternoon flurry which marks 10 months of the year for most families. While that is not a fundamental reason for us to homeschool, it is a factor. And while I would likely adjust quite nicely (ha ha, would more likely experience some relief and joy) having the boys at school 30 hours/week, I really don't think that is the best thing for them or me at this point in our development as a family (or, dare I say, for most tiny people...but that is another topic, and I realize there are many reasons people choose to do so). And while all of us being around each other all the time (even now that I am working again part-time, I am mostly at home when doing so) is not always easy, I don't think our family time would be improved much by squishing it all into busy mornings and early evenings with lots of competing demands and more outside influences on relationship dynamics and personal development.

We looked forward to officially beginning our homeschool adventure by attending a local not back to school picnic this week...but it was rained out, essentially. Therefore no fanfare around here so far. I have the first 18 weeks of our learning year mapped out, and we officially begin on Monday.

I have no idea how we will end up as far as our approach to learning, and I don't want to be excessively structured...but we all seem to do better with routine, and since Geoff will actually be facilitating most of the learning, things are outlined pretty clearly at this point for easy follow-through. I feel pretty flexible, though, and am open to discovering new ways of doing this as we go along.

Being a book buff, and a lover of themes, we chose to use "Come Sit By Me" as a literature-based unit study format (reportedly similar to Five In A Row). The suggested activities are pretty creative, and offer lots of options for picking and choosing what will work based on age, interest, learning needs, etc. Most of these activities could be optional for kindergarteners, so it is not a huge problem if we over-plan and can't get to everything on the schedule. I found the "Teach Me Joy" curriculum online when I was searching for cursive-first handwriting programs, and since it was so inexpensive, I purchased that as an outline for core academics and Bible. We'll see how it goes. I like the supplementary materials that are suggested for use in conjunction with the basic curriculum, and it seems like it will tailor well to both our JK and SK boys, using separate math and pre-writing materials with each boy, as needed.

Generally, I envision 3 days/week of core subjects plus a couple of other topics (art, music, history, etc.). One additional day will hopefully cover just the core subjects (partly based on a regular weekly commitment we have), and Fridays will be mostly open for outings, adventures, and other pursuits. Again, we will just have to wait and see how it plays out (but that is what we were basically doing in the spring, which seemed to work well).

I will try to post regular updates on our educational adventures!

Lullaby...

Uttered by Caye (27 months) this week, while trying our new approach of a "snuggle" after lights out at bedtime (due to recent major bedtime "I don't want to sleep!!!!!!" issues):

"I want to snuggle."

"Why you going to pee?" (on night #2 as I rose to leave the room, after successfully making an exit on night #1 by citing a need to use the bathroom)

"I like Granny's/Mommy's/Daddy's/Grandpa's/others' glasses." (one full sentence per person)

"Do you love Daddy/Mookie(Lute)/Titchie(Kitch)/Hesper/Gladwyn/Motet/Scat/Granny/Grandpa/Aunt Rebecca/Robin/Bronwyn/Uncle Alex/etc.?"

"I love [all of the above, in turn]."

"Jesus loves me."

"I trying to rest (whilst attempting to strap velcro loop on musical mobile plush lion around her ankle)!"

"I trying, I trying, I trying to sleep (whilst rolling around attempting to unfasten velcro strap around ankle, and then starting directly at me)."

"(tearfully, after one of my attempts to leave her room) I can't find my blanket!"

"(ragefully, after my return to assist with blanket) I don't want my blanket. No....!!!!!!!!!!! I don't want it!!!!!!! I no want my blanket!!!!!"

"[screaming & yelling - opening door on her own, standing briefly in hallway screeching, then returning to room & closing door]." (I was pleasantly surprised that opening the door did not lead to an attempt to fully exit and avoid returning to room).

"Bip-bip-bip-ba-ba-do--bip-bip-bip...etc...[sing-song-ish] - Do you like this song? [repeat]."

 "Round and round the garden, goes the polar bear....wee-wee-wee-wee, home."

"[tongue clucking] Do you like this song?"

"I love your/Daddy's ears."

"I love your/Daddy's other ear."

"I love your/Daddy's/Titchie's/Mookie's/Grandpa's/Granny's/Jimmy's[Granny & Grandpa's dog] body."

"I love my body."

...and a random story about Kitch and his underwear.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________ 

For the record, she is currently bustling around the living room at 9:45pm (our kiddos have a pretty consistent 7:30ish bedtime), doing acrobatics on a magazine rack while wearing too-big flip-flops, drawing, etc. This after she followed me downstairs wailing. 

For over a year, we have had few bedtime issues (a couple of short streaks of crying after we left the room, but nothing too intense or lasting. She also has occasional restless nights, where she fusses a couple of times between her bedtime and mine). My instinct is not to let her fall asleep in distress (and I can't imagine the screaming hysteria helps her brothers go to sleep across the hall), and I still remember last summer when my presence with her in the night was not a comfort, so I guess I still find something meaningful in her wanting me with her at bedtime. Last week, I managed to leave the room a couple of times by letting her look at books until she fell asleep (she was up for quite a while one night with that approach). We have also had success a couple of times with one of us lying with her for a while. However, the past few attempts to stay with her have not worked out well, as she has been very active and chatty with us in the room. 

I wish I knew whether she simply has a new awareness that the day goes on for Geoff and I after she goes to bed, or a realization that she can choose whether or not to sleep - and who would want to do that??, or whether her sleep needs (e.g., bedtime, nap span, etc.) have changed, or whether she is having bad dreams (we hear a lot of "No...I don't want to sleep!"), or...something else.

I am feeling a little too unstructured in our efforts to come up with a 'plan' - I tend to be pretty consistent with expectations, and that is easy enough for me to do with the boys in particular, who arrived at ages where that kind of follow-through seemed to be generally do-able (well, with great effort). With Caye, though, I still feel stuck in transition from the baby stage of loading up on instant response and comfort and soothing, toward delivering a little clearer message about boundaries and expectations (while still being nurturing) - so hard to know when to let her live out the distress of coming up against a firm limit, and when to flex a bit to relieve that distress and provide comfort. And with bedtime, there is the added layer of not really knowing how much her sense of safety/security is involved with the reluctance to let us go at night, and not wanting to ignore that possibility.

Anyway, at least there is some amusement to be had while hanging out in her room. Bedtime #2 is about to take place - Geoff will attempt this one, after prying her away from the book she is currently perusing with lots of commentary, such as "Oh, Man!" and "I want to have my green apple."

All Natural (in a modified kind of way)

Here is a non-parenting-or-child-related post for you, because I care not to dwell on the various rambunctious and unsafe antics of my youngsters, who apparently think it is no big deal if they have to spend the rest of their lives within arm's reach, playing with air, to ensure that they actually have a life to live, and who apparently decided to let their antics carry over into Sunday School to the point that their behaviour was worth mentioning to us (which, by the way Sunday School teachers, I am very thankful for - because I definitely want to know if they are up to less-than-classroom-worthy shenanigans, and if they keep this up they might just get to see how willing I am to act on my "keep the kids in the church service" philosophy, for everyone's good).

So, to keep things perhaps moderately interesting, I decided pictures would be prudent. And the only interesting-ish new pictures I have are in regard to my hair and Geoff's birdhouses. I have loosely grouped these two topics into the "all natural" theme, because a truly random post of un-related bits and pieces would be distressing to me in some way.

Ok. Let us begin with my hair (so that we can end on a more lovely note). My hair is not easily classified, but can definitely be considered wavy. Sometimes curly, but not predictably. Sometimes full of body, but not predictably. Sometimes uniform in its overall appearance, but rarely so. It tends to curl better in the summer, with humidity, which can be both a blessing and a curse (often simultaneously). I often straighten it in the winter, to look sleeker with more tailored winter clothes and because (if I sleep on it right), I can get away with no styling on the second day...oh, and it's nice to be able to wear a hat on a cold day. In the summer, it tends to be allowed to be free-er.

I am not crabby about having wavy/curly/wayward hair - it holds (curling iron-assisted) curl well, holds bobby pins well for up-dos, can be straightened in dry weather, and can occasionally turn out nice enough naturally (with the help of a diffuser, and as long as I don't wear a hat or encounter weather of any kind. Like a breeze). However, what folks with straighter hair don't seem to appreciate when they make jealous comments about curly hair, is that there are considerations (some of which I have listed above) and unpredictable aspects - I truly never know what texture, shape, or volume it will choose on any given day.


Anyway, I made a more intentional decision a few weeks ago to pretty much let it curl (still with the diffuser - air drying just makes it look really untended - trust me) and keep it simple. The main motivator was work-related. Working from home, and not being a morning person, means that every day gets going far later than I would like. My shower helps wake me up (and means I don't have the dilemma of whether to put clean clothes on an un-showered body, or wear slightly less-than-clean clothes until after a shower later in the day - ack, decisions, decisions), and therefore goes at the beginning of my day. Followed by hair styling. Straightening doesn't take an excessive amount of time, but still keeps me away from my desk. And many days I'm not really going anywhere.

If I had more confidence just to look unconventional, I would likely have just moved on and gone about my business. But I was feeling pretty shaggy, and did receive one comment (not intended rudely at all - I was not upset) about how I must have had a rushed morning. I was also due for a trim & colour, and generally don't keep my hair the same way for more than one or two cuts. It's been longer-ish for a while now, so I thought I might as well go ahead and have it cut pretty short again. So now I've been wearing it natural, and shorter, and on a frightening hair day, I have no options - it can't be hidden in an up-do, or tucked neatly behind my ears with a hat, or accented with a scarf (well, it can, in a scarecrow-ish kind of way). And now that we're a week into this new 'do, the hair salon magic that keeps it manageable and uniform and soft for a wash or two is gone, and I am alarmed.


What I have posted for you is NOT the alarming state I face at the moment. This is a picture taken after the first wash & style with this cut. Tonight I took pictures of the Frankenstein's monster-style look I have going, after coming home with it wind-blown (which in my case actually blows out any softness and curl at the ends, and turns it into a straw-like mass of sticking-out ends), and brushing it out. Yikes. Those pictures, however, are not yet uploaded, so you have been spared either the horror or the laughter.


In other news, Geoff is back at his birdhouse-making, which he quite enjoys, and has the luxury of starting up again now that I have somehow ended up working more to support the family while he continues parental leave without pay. Ah, the irony of life. I would not have predicted this arrangement, but as it turns out, I find the work-kids balance pretty reasonable, and since it is Geoff with them all day, at home (rather than shipping them off somewhere), it feels ok, and I'm actually around most of the time anyway, as all my non-client work happens from home, for better or for worse. (And, as an aside, one of the things I enjoy about my current job is that there is plenty of opportunity to expand my repertoire, and being a sucker for continuous learning activities, that works for me). Back to birdhouses.


Geoff likes to create with salvaged wood and vintage trimmings whenever possible - ok, I guess trimmings, however vintage, are not natural products per se, as per my theme, but the wood is, right? He has just come home with a couple of loads of barn-board from a demolition project, and has set up some work space in the garage out back. In theory, he hopes to sell them. If not, family & friends know what they will be getting for gifts for various occasions into the future. That is likely what you will be getting regardless. Enjoy.

And that is that. And now, having done nothing on my evening to-do list, I should likely go investigate the sounds of wailing from baby girl's room, and consider my own bedtime preparations as I need to leave the house at the un-earthly hour of 7:00am tomorrow, wild hair and all.